Cocoon as a butterfly: the path to psychological adjustment for divorced parents

In the plural family structure of today ‘ s society, the separation of parents has become a stepping stone for many children. According to incomplete statistics, the number of children of divorced families has increased in recent years as the divorce rate continues to rise. These children often face a complex and difficult process of psychological adjustment as families break up. In the early days of parental separation, children are often filled with a strong sense of loss. The loss of security is deeply felt when once-completed families break up in an instant and familiar family environment, and the pattern of sweet parenting is broken. It was like a small boat that had been moored in a calm harbour, suddenly caught in the sea of a storm. Especially when children from other complete families are seen, this contrast increases their internal pain and confusion, may become silenced, emotionally depressed or even socialized, fearing to look at others differently. Over time, some children may fall into a vortex of self-doubt and blame. They often wonder if parents won’t divorce if they behave better. This faulty attribution has severely undermined their self-esteem and self-confidence, with negative attitudes towards learning and life, with a possible decline in outstanding academic achievements and the setting aside of their once-honored interests. However, in the face of such a dilemma, separated children are not left to wander in darkness. They can take the initiative to seek support from outsiders, such as close and trusted friends, to speak out about their inner pain. The understanding and company of friends can provide them with warm comforts that they know that they are not alone. At the same time, psychological guidance teachers in schools are also important clients. Psychiatry teachers have the professional knowledge and skills to guide their children through scientific methods to understand their emotions correctly, to help them rebuild their self-confidence and to move out of their psychological shadows. In the area of self-adaptation, children can try to write a diary and record their feelings and thoughts, which helps them to sort out their emotions, reflect on themselves and heal themselves in writing. Painting is also a good way to express incomprehensible emotions and release pressure through colour and lines. Sport is also essential, as body-spoiled endorphins can effectively improve emotions, allow them to forget their troubles and increase their psychological resilience in sweating. From a family point of view, it is more important for divorced parents to take on the responsibility of helping their children to adapt. Even if a marriage breaks down, both parties must maintain their care and care for their children, so that their parents ‘ love is not reduced by divorce. They should be given full opportunity to express themselves, to listen patiently to their hearts and to convey their support with warm embraces and encouraging eyes. In the form of education, it is necessary to avoid over-abundance or over-crowding, but rather to establish reasonable rules and expectations that will help the child to develop the right values and vision of life, based on his or her character and developmental needs. For example, parents can regularly carry out outdoor activities with their children, such as mountain climbing, picnics, etc., to promote filiation in a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere and to keep the children warm. Society should also create an inclusive and inclusive environment for these children. Communities can organize a variety of care activities to provide a platform for children of divorced families to interact with their peers, so that they can feel the warmth and goodwill of society in their collective activities. The media can also lead the public to view the children of divorced families in a positive light and to eliminate prejudices and discrimination against them. The psychological adjustment of divorced children is a long and twisted process, but if they themselves face up to it and actively seek help, together with the family and society, they will be able to relive themselves in a difficult situation, re-emergence their own gloom and lead to healthy growth and happiness.